My Fashion Resolutions
I'm manifesting whale hats, anime dresses, Bill Blass, and more for 2024.
Hi all! Below are my ten fashion resolutions for 2024. My non-fashion resolutions are to read a book for the first time in years (I’m starting with I Remember by Joe Brainard on my friend Anayvelyse’s recommendation), wear earplugs to every show, get back into weed, get a job that pays the bills, and keep making HR posts by hook or by crook (a saying that’s been cropping up around me weirdly often recently after a lifetime of not hearing it).
If you like these posts, please let me know by liking and commenting here or on HR’s Instagram, subbing to the HR Substack (this) for free, getting bonus posts for seven bucks a month, or for ZERO DOLLARS, share (tag me if on IG so I can see and thank you)!
If you cannot afford the $7/month, I totally understand—respond to any of my email sends and I will get you a $2 subscription or comp you, whatever you need. HR is for everyone!
Thank you SO MUCH for your support, whatever you are able and willing to do to help is extremely valuable to me and I’m honored to be a small part of your life on the web.
Never buy hard pants online
It’s simply always a mistake, for me. Jeans and trousers sizing is so insanely unreliable, especially for people on either side of the height bell curve (admin reveal I’m extremely short). I have tried on XLs that were smaller than other brands’ XSes. It’s complete anarchy in the world of pant sizes, and I think I have succeeded in discovering a pair online that truly fit me about once for every 24 attempts I’ve made in my life. This is why pants are severely underrepresented in my wardrobe as anime t-shirts spawn seemingly out of nowhere. It’s not great for my style bottom line, but I must hold fast to this resolution and, nodding to another resolution below, buy pants in-store.
The only place I’ve found in Buenos Aires with hard pants that reliably fit me is Limay, an excellent, queer + gender agnostic denim company with a showroom that exudes serene vibes, healing the wounds left by the harsh lights of Gap dressing rooms in 2011. They have a limited stock of shapes and colors, but the “Dad Slim” shape is a solid straight leg, mid-waist jean. The issue is I only like its dark denim and black colorways—they haven’t released it in their superior acid wash yet, and the light blue is kind of ugly in person, I don’t know what rubs me the wrong way about it—maybe it’s too uniform, not at all distressed or faded in a way that creates interesting shapes and lines, though that would come with wear, and the distressing valor would be all yours.
The length of these is weirdly Sisterhood of the Traveling Pantsy in that I’ve seen people of all heights wear them and look normal, which is so rare for a straight-legged jean. I’m usually stuck with getting them tailored, but these fall perfectly on me (unlike some of the brand’s other styles). They fall right below my belly button but don’t make me feel like I’m getting a long, slow punch in the stomach. I got the pairs on sale for about $35 each. I don’t love to shop new, but when a pant fits me sans tailoring, I cling onto it for dear life.
In heels/flats, edited to spare you of the state of my room right now:
But if I were gonna buy hard pants (which I’m not), they’d be this almost-ugly, quite charming pair with a weird leg shape, superfluous strap, and too many buttons from 90s Kapital:
Convert my t-shirts
As mentioned above, I have too many anime t-shirts, and while I wear them with diligent frequency, I don’t feel my best in a t-shirt for some reason, so I’d like to cull my collection (the shirts from Platinum Baka are untouchable, I’m afraid, though their necks are a smidge too high for my liking) and “make” (pay someone to make, most likely) a dress or other garment out of them. Lifer Shop is the brand I’ve seen do this best:
I would wear the above, probably not the below, but replace the Dragonball, Trigun, and Pokemon with One Piece, JJK, and Mob Psycho 100, and I’d probably fold:
Re-open closed holes
I want to either unadvisedly rip open or get professionally re-pierced my 3+ lobe piercings I used to have on each ear. I had hoops in each for a few years, but once I took them out, inertia took over, and they never went back in. My lobes are the only part of my body that doesn’t automatically reject piercings, and I miss having ‘em. Maybe getting flatbacks will keep me from taking them out:
But I’ll be sorely tempted by a stack of Zoro hoops, even though I usually don’t wear gold:
Find a worthy coat companion
I wore a Collina Strada puffer and a street fair shearling coat all last Buenos Aires winter, but eventually, I’d like a Proper Coat that’s weird enough to never bore me and will last me until I croak, probably Comme Des Garçons:
Or Bill Blass, who both Anayvelyse and
have mentioned recently is due for a renaissance:
Don’t be fooled by flats
God, I love how ballet flats look, but my feet and ankles and knees and hips are so deeply fucked up that my attempt at wearing them was near-lethal. I have no idea how I suffered through it in middle school, though I remember it being hellish even in the days of my youth. Any low heel, from a loafer’s to a kitten, is infinitely better for me than a true flat, even if my tolerance for them is similarly low.
These are blissfully insane, each thing Fey Fey Worldwide makes feels like it follows the exact aesthetic logic of my weirdest dreams.
These Dries Van Noten FW23 kitten heels with built-in socks feel similarly dreamlike (sold, fml):
And of course, so do CDG’s buckle loafers (which are not in my size, fml):
Match with Alma
Because she is sooooo ready to be a model:
Damson Madder doesn’t have much right now, but they usually have a selection of actually cute garments that match your puppy’s:
Though I wish this embroidery were customizable:
Try plastic-framed glasses
It’s been maybe seven years since I last wore plastic-framed glasses, and I’d always get some fuckboy style named Felix or whatever from Warby Parker, but I’d like to try something more porny librarian, square and skinny, probably just for special occasions, because I typically need to actually have a wide range of vision:
Or I could stick to my penchant for a different perverted shape, the aviator:
Wear many hats
My hair is…not it right now, I have a vision but it’s in an in-between stage and I really need to be covering that shit up in public instead of wandering around like I stuck my finger in an electric socket all the time. It’s also good for my skin! I always feel like I’m visibly roasting when I’m not wearing a hat in the sun.
I’m still figuring out how to tie and style this one:
I got the above (for about $16) because I liked the below so much, I’ve posted about it before:
My heart dropped out of my butt when I saw the below. It’s just too good. I literally don’t know how you could style this without looking insane, but I don’t care. It’s the fashion version of the foam mascot hats at sports games. I’d find a team with a whale mascot to become a fan of just to wear this hat at a game (they did it dirty with the spectacles pairing):
Go in-store more
I barely shop, both because I’m hard-up on cash and it’s virtually impossible to get stuff shipped to Argentina, so when I do, it’s typically in-store, and I always forget how important the try-on experience is. I only just, after a year of its existence, discovered Sadaels in Buenos Aires, I think because it only recently began stocking a few brands I already know and love like Calomel (the Nu Swim dupe) and Ferrens (kind of MNZ-adjacent with more whimsy), but I enjoyed trying on this very expensive shirt that’s not online yet from the in-house brand (very gaucho culture-inspired):
With the best back:
The below pieces I actually got, a top and bottom, were both much more affordable and from Ferrens. I never would have chosen the top online, but in-person its fit was so perfect I was smitten. I’d been eyeing the skirt for awhile, but couldn’t envision it on me, so going in-store was the catalyst for purchase.
Make something!!!
The below one-of-one piece by @kaya1209 made me want to get proficient even at shitty hand-sewing:
Thank you so much for being here for another year. It’s been a really challenging and painful one for me, personally, so if you’re getting inundated with year-end round-ups showing people grinning about achieving all their dreams in 2023 and you feel discouraged, know that some of us had a shitty year too! You’re not alone! I did publish the most work I’ve ever published in a year in 2023, which I’m proud of, and I’m proud I’ve kept this blog/newsletter/whatever it wants to be chugging along for another 365 days. It’s because you’re here and I like to write to you.
<3 HR
Bill Blass great finds on TRR...very fab coats; but also if you ever come across one of those kaleidoscope sequin Bill Blass jackets for less than, like, an arm and a leg...run do not walk...!
Concerning your trouble with sizing - it's a huge problem in the fashion world that no one is trying to solve. I am working on a startup that makes custom-fit clothing using body scans. Let me know what you think of the idea. https://scantogz.substack.com/about